21st Sunday of Ordinary Time, B August 25, 2024
Fr. Alexander Albert St. Mary Magdalen, Abbeville
N.B. This in the conclusion of a series on John 6. The series starts here. The previous homily is here.
“This saying is hard; who can accept it?” So we come to the crux of the Bread of Life discourse in John chapter 6. Last week Jesus insistently taught that we are to truly eat his body and drink his blood. The Eucharist literally becomes his body, blood, soul, and divinity during the consecration at Mass. A miracle and a mystery, but true.
Throughout this journey, we’ve seen hints of the difficulty that faith can pose on the followers of Jesus. Now that difficulty comes to a head with people moving from honest questions to outright rejection. Sadly, “as a result” of this teaching “many of his disciples returned to their former way of life and no longer accompanied him.” If you needed yet more proof that Jesus wasn’t just being symbolic: He is more willing to lose followers than to explain away his teaching on the Eucharist.
If you heard from me last week, you may remember that I said I don’t blame people who struggle to believe the more difficult teachings of the Church. I also promised to offer a way forward: what should a Catholic or a potential Catholic do when they run up against a teaching they just can’t seem to accept?
In our increasingly divided, fragmented, and misinformed culture, there’s a temptation to really bear down on serious disagreements. “Oh, you don’t think that’s true? Let me bury you with facts, overwhelm you with arguments, or mock you with memes and video clips of me ‘destroying’ the other side in a debate.”
But is that what Jesus does? What do you read here? “Jesus then said to the Twelve, ‘Do you also want to leave?” Not a rebuke, but a question. He doesn’t chase down the crowds to berate them. He doesn’t become melodramatic to emotionally manipulate the apostles. He doesn’t even ask them “Do you understand what I’ve said.” He’s not asking for perfection right now, just asking if they’ll stick around.
Peter’s answer becomes our guide, our model for the moments of difficulty in our faith: “Master, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and are convinced that you are the Holy One of God.” Me and my house will serve the Lord. We don’t get it, but we really do believe in you, so we’ll stick it out even when we don’t get everything you’re saying and doing.
And Jesus never changes his teaching. He doesn’t tell them it’s fine if they never accept what he’s said. But he does accept that, for right now, they’ll keep following. We don’t know when each of the Apostles finally came around to fully assenting to his teaching on the Eucharist, but by the time of the Last Supper, no one squirms when he says “this is my body.” We know that after Pentecost, the breaking of the bread – the Eucharist – is standard practice for all Christians.
It can be the same with you. People often confess the sin of doubt to me, but I’m not sure they really understand what that sin is. It can be sinful to doubt, but having a question is not. Having difficulties in your faith is not the same thing as sinful doubt. Sinful doubt is when you either reject the truth because you don’t understand it or when you allow difficulties to justify laxity in the practice of faith. Just because you aren’t 100% certain about some Catholic teaching, it’s not an excuse to stop going to Mass and doing all the normal Catholic stuff.
An example: Mother Teresa experienced extreme temptations to doubt God’s existence. One time in adoration, she leaned over to a priest and asked him “where is Jesus?” because her inner sense of darkness was so overwhelming. But did she stop going to adoration? Stop serving the poor? Stop praying? No. She had difficulties, questions, and uncertainties, but she did not allow those to slide into sinful doubt, into an excuse to stop practicing the faith that she knew was true overall. You’ll find many saints had similar trials.
This doesn’t just apply to the Eucharist. I’d guess most of you don’t struggle with the Eucharist as much as with other teachings: marriage without divorce, the sinfulness of artificial contraception, sexual morality, the all-male priesthood, papal infallibility, the inerrancy of scripture, the difference between male and female roles in the family, the resurrection of the body… all of these are part of Catholic teaching. Many of them are also commonly rejected by the world and, sadly, even by self-professed Catholics.
Rejecting them is a problem. But struggling with them? Not understanding them? That’s different. I – and Jesus and the Church – can work with that. If you find yourself there in the situation of examining your Catholic faith or simply considering becoming Catholic and struggling with a particular teaching – don’t worry too much. Engage with it as best you can. Do the “work” of belief by taking actions of faith even if you don’t feel it. Begin changing the habits that make that belief harder. If you hit a wall, don’t be afraid to let the question be for a while. You don’t have to figure it out right now. You don’t have to pause your faith journey until you find perfect understanding.
Instead, you can do as the Apostles do: hold it loosely. Don’t reject it and, most importantly, don’t walk away. Instead, focus back on Jesus Christ himself. “Lord, I don’t get this… I don’t know how this can be true, but I do believe in you… you have the words of eternal life.” Look back at the teachings you do see, that you do know to be true. Each truth is like a path leading to the center who is Jesus Christ. If you find that one path, one teaching is like a wall for you, don’t turn back and leave. Instead, switch to a path you can follow without rejecting the one you can’t. As you get closer to Christ on that path, you’ll one day turn around to realize you’ve passed the wall on that other path and now can step back onto wither greater light and understanding.
Do not become a cafeteria Catholic, picking and choosing what to believe or not – that’s not how Catholic faith works. But it also isn’t all or nothing right now. As long as we are not so arrogant as to reject what we don’t understand, there is room for the search. There is room for the gradual discovery that the same beauty you find in the teaching you do like is present in the teaching you don’t like, if only you stay close to Jesus long enough to recognize that all of his words lead to everlasting life. “Do you also want to leave?” I don’t and I hope you don’t either.